overproportioNATE

Life has a way of mellowing out a person. There are so many bumps along the road of life, that at first can really shake you, can really derail you. I don't think that the severity of the bumps has changed. They are simply more frequent. There isn't time to worry about handling each bump perfectly. I think that this will help me to say to "no" to more things in life, because there just isn't enough time for everything. --- I think I'll be O.K. moving to Denver.

Sorry that I haven't been writing as much lately, this whole school year really. I love writing, if anything, my love for writing has only increased in the last year. Time isn't always provided for our passions however. The next time I write could very well take place in Colorado. I am going to be there for the majority of the next 3 years. It's wild to think about, I've been at my job here at OHS for not quite 3 years. I have no idea how much time and how much thought will be demanded of me at Denver Sem. I am hopeful that it will push me and challenge me, I am excited to see what I will be like, what I will be capable of... in 3 years time. I want to write more poetry in the next few years. I've really gotten away from it because I just haven't had the opportunity to sit down, slap on my headphones and write with Sixpence None the Richer flavoring my words. I hope to find the time to write words that will surprise even myself. I don't know what to te...

It seems that some will look their whole lives for some kind of pattern to life. They will drudge through jobs they never liked to begin with, pass through weekends at the bar, by mornings at the chapel. When this happens, then this action will occur. Whenever you have A, you will then create B. There are very few real patterns to life. Karma is a fiction fed to the under-privileged. Things that go around don't always come around. Sometimes the good live long lives and the Jerks die young. There is one pattern. One pattern that holds true in each and every human life. It is oft-ignored. The individualist seeks not to find it. The pattern of love for each one, 'til death. We have but one life. There are correlations, or what seem to be correlations. Exercise for good health. But often enough to rip that pattern to shreds, a runner will drop dead. Heart-attack, stroke, blood clot. Exercise, eat well, and you will live long, maybe. Obey your parents, and you will have th...

Any ideal, any perfect, or best thing, attracts some, and repels others. The best Ice Cream will be loved by many, and then others will find it unhealthy and disgusting. The best, freshest produce will be found healthy and fresh by some, and hated by others. We will never all agree on the best song, best president, best values, best morals, best time of day, best activity, best life. We life as though we could. But even Christ's message was divisive. He knew it would be. His message was good news, and admitted the struggle. It was repelling to many, too difficult, too demanding, too truthful. The bests always are.

I'm moving to Denver. For 3 years. I got the full-ride scholarship. I am excited but afraid. I am excited for adventure, but don't want to go. Colorado has always been a place that I could see myself, but I love my family and friends. Just wanted to update you, sorry I haven't written much lately, it has been a different level of busy lately.

The message is sitting in my gmail inbox. I can't bring myself to look at it. I feel like throwing up. I have never had the events of my life determined by an interview, or by such a seemingly small series of events. Let alone a single email. I'm not even sure that I know what I want. I'm not even sure that it should matter if I know what I want. Does what I want matter? I will know later. I'll open it with my wife. I'd post it here first, if I wasn't so terrified of opening that email. Sorry to be a tease, but if you're reading this, I'm sure I'll talk to you soon anyway. Take care.

There are things that happen in life that cause all others to cease. All other movement, momentum, is quelled. All other questions have to wait their turn. Life as it has been known, halts. I'm having a hard time being excited about much else. I wait to hear back, I wait to know. The rest of the time-piece has stopped in this pause. It is alright. It is all right. I have been having good days lately. I have been productive & happy. I love getting things done. I enjoy small steps, and progress. I also enjoy new burgers from Hardees. That's something too, isn't it? I'm looking forward to knowing. I always look forward to the knowing part of life. Even if things don't live up to the hype, I am glad to finally understand the thing. Uncertainty and indecision, they are trying, and must be lived through, but I want what they lead to.